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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......

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• (509): View more from Washington

  I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.

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• (339): View more from Massachusetts

  100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before

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• (626): View more from California

  So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"

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• (951): View more from California

  Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there

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• (512): View more from Texas

  I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it

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