Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize