super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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