thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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