With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
