I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
