I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
