arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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