Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize