you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
