Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
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