I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
i would one night stand the shit outta him
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
