You really coming over, don't trick.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
