The maid of honor just puked.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
