What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Couch. On fire.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Randomize
