It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
BRING THE BAGELS
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
