Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
50% drunk capacity currently
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
