If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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