He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
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