I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
someone owes me an orgasm
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
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