What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
