You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize