Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
When are your genitals available?
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Randomize
