All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
