Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize