Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
