Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
She made me pour olive oil on her.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
