i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
