WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
