Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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