just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
