never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
