I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
