I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
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