Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Randomize
