I like to think it a success when the cops are called
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
