you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
