If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
