Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
