jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
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