Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
