I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
