he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
