So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
