i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
