he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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