I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Small penises have feelings too.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
operation have a gay friend backfired
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Randomize
