I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
