I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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