I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
